Open Letters

Dear Staples,
I figured out where all of your Large Binder Clips are. You can stop looking. They are all at the Office Depot.

Love, the girl who doesn't think that 1 1/4" binder clips are big enough

P.S. No, I don't want you to order them. If I wanted to order them, I wouldn't have come to the store in the first place.

**************************************************************************

Dear Joann Fabrics,
I do not like your decor section. Everything is very small, and thus useless for commercial decoration. But you suck me in with the hope that the large decoration section will somehow include large decorations. Alas, all you have are small decorations that I want to buy and put up on my own tree, but I do not have time to dilly dally with personal purchases when I need decor or props NOW.
Yours truly, a young project manager

**************************************************************************

Dear Decorators,
Those clips you have that go into the concession stand to hold decorations are really cool. Where did they come from?
Sincerely yours, me

**************************************************************************

Dear Apartment,
Why are you so inconsistent in temperature? Some nights, the radiators are blasting and its almost too hot. And then, you go for a few days where it is barely warm enough to be legal. I would just like you to find a middle ground and stay there, all winter, October through April. Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is.
From, the girl on the East side of Apartment 2

**************************************************************************